What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

How are max different from medical and minimum security prisons?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

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Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

My stepmother has banned me from the family. Can she legally keep me from going to my father's funeral?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

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But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Make Nazis afraid again!

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Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

What happens when you need emergency surgery in countries with universal healthcare vs the US?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

What are the best ways to treat seasonal allergies?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

What I have noticed is nearly every girl I try to connect with whom reject me are in their early 20s why is that the case?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

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Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why am I so unproductive when it's a holiday the next day?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Is it possible for sociopaths to feel genuine remorse for their actions or thoughts towards others, even if they are skilled at hiding it from others?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.